So where do we even begin... well for starters, hello! I know this summer I've been extra MIA around here and to be completely honest with you, I am ok with that. I made a conscious decision of letting go of the pressure this season. I know sometimes it may not seem that way but Instagram and blogging can be a lot. I mean, sure it's fun and the opportunities you get are amazing, but learning to balance it out is tough. At least for me it has felt that way this summer, so therefore I decided to step back, without notice, just stepped back and did what my heart desired. 

I've been blogging for quite some time now and I have to be honest, not sure if I am coming to the end of this road or I am just going through a phase but it no longer feels exciting. Once this platform became a business, things changed for me. I am not complaining, things have definitely changed for the better. I would never take my lifestyle for granted and I know that I am extremely blessed to live the life that I do. I don’t need to work a 9-5 job, instead I get to do what I love and be creative. I get to work directly with brands I admire and love. Most importantly, thanks to this very blog, I have been able to enjoy the last 8 years of motherhood, front row and center! I’ve made my own schedule, I’ve seen all my children’s first milestones, been to all the class trips, enjoyed summers with them and live a life a lot of moms would kill for. So please don’t think I am complaining for a second, I am simply, sharing my current thoughts so that you guys understand where I am. 

But with all of that said, there is also this pressure that comes along with this great business. The pressure to create content for brands and to be consistently shooting photos and building up these digital platforms and it’s hard. You are constantly “on” 24/7 and it’s freakin’ exhausting. The pressure to keep up and create cool images and unique content… is exhausting. And to be honest, half of me felt really good about this unplanned break but the other half of me, the Gemini that can’t stay still in me, feels somewhat defeated. Defeated because I felt like I didn’t do enough and didn’t go as far as I could have. I have a lot of personal goals but as you know, this blog and IG are a bigger part of my income, so “taking a break” for too long is simply not an option right now, therefore, I hope that my creativity and inspiration come back overflowing very soon… because I do miss that Erika.

I always like to be honest with you guys and as much as I love my digital presence here and/or on IG, I know in my heart that there is more to me than these photos and I am working on that so pray for me. There’s this passion project I’ve been working on for pretty much the entire year, it’s a whole other business idea that I am very excited about and when it does come into fruition, I will be shouting it out from the rooftops. For now, I felt the need to write and to be honest about how I am feeling. 

With that said, summer is almost over… school is almost back in session and routines are making a come back in the next couple of weeks. I hope you guys have had an excellent summer and will have an even better last quarter of 2019! Please send me all your love and positive energy so that we can continue to build this online family. I am sending you all of my love and light. Un abrazo.

We have a brand new baby! Well a fur baby that is... and she is just precious! If you follow me on Instagram (and you should!) you know I announced our new baby a few days ago. I wanted to share her story because I think it's worth the read... because when things are meant to be, they just are.

On August 1st, exactly one year since Lola's passing, I posted a photo of her and I on IG to commemorate the day she left us and earned her puppy wings. She was such a big part of our family and was with us for 12 years. To my surprise, the very next morning, when I woke up I had a DM from one of my followers and I'll let you guys read it for yourselves: 

...when I read this, I teared. How incredible is it that we've built such an amazing loving community online... you guys are my online friends, I dislike the word "followers" and this instance proved that to me, tenfold. We adore dogs and Lola meant so much to our family and losing her last year was tough. Until this very day, Emme mentions her almost daily. She had conversations with me about how we are going to go "pick up Lola in Heaven" and how she's going to "come back"... I tried explaining to her in so many different ways that she will not come back but being 4 years old, I think death is hard to grasp. To be honest, it broke my heart every time Emme talked about Lola. We miss her so much, so this new puppy was definitely heaven sent straight to our home. I certainly believe in destiny and that things happen for a reason. We weren't planning on getting a puppy right now, but we had the conversation several times in the past weeks.

Dave and I discussed it for 2 days and we finally came to the conclusion that a new puppy would be perfect for our family. She was so well taken care of at her birth home and the family adores dogs just like us, all 7 puppies were treated like babies so we went to meet her a few days before making our final decision. When we saw her we fell in love and we knew she was it. Having a new dog is a big decision for any family and as dog lovers we wanted to make sure that we were ready. Our decision was highly influenced by how much the kids missed our beloved Lola and to be honest, I don't think we would get another opportunity at loving gifted puppy. We are eternally grateful to Lane & Adam for our sweet baby girl. Thank you for trusting me and my family with her, she's added joy to our home.

Sure, we are tired and the sleepless nights are not fun but we don't regret our decision at all. Emme barely plays with her toys and makes messes anymore because she doesn't want her puppy to choke on her tiny toys... and Ben used to run down to the living room to watch cartoons in the mornings, now he plays with the puppy for hours before remembering we even have a TV. She's just perfect!

So you might be wondering, after that poll on IG... what did we name her? Well we finally picked a name and it wasn't an easy choice... I really wanted a unisex name like Charlie & Frankie but the rest of the crew wasn't in agreement. So all four of us wrote our favorite names on a piece of paper then voted... the contenders were Bailey and Penelope. And finally we chose: PENELOPE SCOUT! We call her Penny and Penelope Scout when she does something she is not supposed to, lol!

Thank you guys for helping us choose a name, we are super happy with our choice! Cheers to new fur babies and awesome amazing people in the world!

The #SoyYoSoyHermosa Project was created by Lissette Pedreiras to bring 11 women together and share our stories, our insecurities and how we are battling self-judgement one day at a time... how we have learned to love ourselves just as we are and how we are driving that confidence out into the world one woman at a time. Below is my story...

As a child, I was always the girl on her mama's lap at parties and wouldn't participate in any of the games because I was too shy to dance in front of anyone or do anything in big crowds for that matter. Elementary school was tough because I didn't know any English at all... I was in the ESL program and didn't know anyone in that school. It was probably one of the toughest years of my childhood. Within one year I learned English and made a couple of friends... still a very shy, sheltered little girl.

I remember being in middle school not knowing who I was during those super awkward years. I wanted to fit in so badly, I wanted curly hair just like all the Puerto Rican and Dominican girls in my school, I wanted to dress cool but my mom couldn't afford it and I just didn't feel like I belonged. I still missed my beloved Ecuador and the warmth and love I grew up surrounded by. Besides trying to find myself as a teenager during those weird years I was also bullied by these girls who made up a rumor that I was a lesbian... I have no issues with lesbians but I knew I wasn't it. But imagine being 12-13 and having this rumor about you at school. I remember my mom had to come in to the school and speak to the counselor about this bullying, I remember I cried. I guess, thinking back, I was what they would call a "goody-two-shoes" but I didn't mean to be, lol, I was simply a really good kid with excellent grades... I had straight A's all throughout middle school and even made it in the Honor's Society Club. So you know kids, they hate even from an early age. 

In high school, I got my first C ever! I wanted to die and I am pretty sure my mom wanted to kill me, lol... I blame it on boys! I had the biggest crush on this boy and was finally coming out of my shell. I made some amazing friends and HS was the highlight of my student life for sure. Now I don't want to credit any boy for my confidence (I rather give all the glory to God!) but that boy I had a crush on in 9th grade eventually became my boyfriend by the time I was a Senior. After two long years of dating, he broke my heart and (of course!) I thought I was going to die. We truly are so stupid when we are teenagers! Lol. 

Something clicked back then and I remember telling myself no one was ever going to hurt me that way again. I prayed that I didn't feel so heartbroken anymore, I prayed for confidence and self love. And it worked... I took public speaking in college and killed my presentation that semester and I started loving speaking in public and was definitely more outgoing. I became a happier more confident young woman. Somehow that sad time in my life gave me a new perspective on how I truly wanted to be and the expectations and goals I wanted to set for myself. Jesus has his ways and I love him eternally for that. 

So sure there are a couple things I love about my body but what I love most is the confident woman I have become over the years. If you told me back then I would be a blogger and speak at several panels, host live TV shows and share photos of myself for a living, I would have laughed at you! Life is wild... you have to learn how to love yourself for who you are in order to see what God has already planned for you. Every experience and event during your life has a purpose. Trust... I look back and laugh because I know God always had this plan for me. If you are still here, thanks for reading a little bit about my story... I hope that it helps you in any way possible and reminds you to always love yourself first.

This is my story but I would like to invite you to read the story of another 10 women who like you and me have felt insecure or "not enough" in the past. Head on over to @liiraven's blog to read all our stories. I hope it this project inspires you to feel more confident in your skin and to always always love yourself! Thanks to Lissette, Geri and David for putting this project together so beautifully! Here are some more shots from this magical day...